21 st May Janmastami 2005
Posted by: BRIJ84.COM
Shri Krsn Janmastami has been finished wonderfully. It was really incredible. National tv took my interview. and 8 another Indian channels were telecasting me world widely. It was something beyond of my imagination. I woke up at 7 in the morning. and saw two camera men are waiting for me. some our disciples had sent them to shoot my father and myself. Firstly i took shower… wore new thread and new dhoti and duppatta. Now, i was ready to go on the alter…… BUTTT…. when i reached the temple i saw, all goswamis were doing their jobs. One old goswami instructed me to guide the youngsters. and EVERYBODY gave me order to take the Yamuna water in the silver pots with some young goswamis. I was literally fainted. Cause i never ever did this work before. But i heard sometimes… its really painful to take a 20 liters silver pot with water on the shoulder. And before janmastami i was on the heavy pain killers. and on the janmastami morning i forgot to take the pain killer. EEHHHHHHHHH!!! On that moment i was on that stage… where there i could not refuse the order. But What will gonna happen???? this question was giving me internal pain.
ATLAST….. straight forward i entered into the deity room… HE(Radharamanji) was getting ready for abhisheka. I touched his feet. gave Him the full Shastang pranam. and told him…. only one thing…. “Everything is upto you. I am not in the mood to leave this abhisheka”
and then i went to the collect the water from Yamuna river with 5-6 goswamis.
UHH LA LA…. i reached the temple without having pain. amazing!!!!!!!!! then, all the devotees (viewers of the abhisheka) knows…. By his divine mercy i did his whole abhisheka. All Goswamis even my father were surprised. NO pain. even before Janmastami…. like last 5 days of janmastami…. i only ate 5 chapatis and 200 grms rice. 3 hrs sleep everynight. So much work load i had. was living only on the medicines… But Sri Radharamanji gave me energy to perform the abhisheka. but after janmastami… I am in fever. 
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I was pouring the milk on Him. My eyes went on his face And i saw, His smile was very mysterical. I forgot everything and guessing what will gonna happen next?
I took the little break in between of abhisheka… but my mind was only guessing…. BUT HE IS THE LORD. IF WE WOULD COME TO KNOW WHAT HE (RADHA RAMAN JI) IS THINKING……. THEN There is NO DIFFRENCE BETWEEN GOD AND DEVOTEE.
One Goswami who was sitting behind Him and holding Him during abhishekacalled me up. and he gave his seat to me. THAT WAS TOTALLY BEYOND OF MY HEAD. COZZZZZ…. IT never happened in last 450 YEARS. that any Goswami give thta seat during abhishek to any Goswami…
I started to cry with happiness to get HIS Divine mercy. He is my everything. I dont’ know, how i always get His sweetest blessings? So bad i am for many persons. Cause of this…. i thought… my Radha Raman have started to hate me. But now, i am wrong… and i wish i always take birth as a GOSWAMI of Shri Radharaman. My dear Lord, We are having evrything cause of YOU. Our identity Starts from You and Ends on You. Give us blessing to spread Your name in this world.
Appearance Day of Shri Radharaman (2005)
Such a auspicious day, i woke up in the morning, parents called me up to remind me “Today is your fast, go and get ready for abhisheka” then i started my day with inner smile in the heart and lots of hope to meet my Radha raman after few months on the alter. i went to took shower… wore new thread and new cloths for abhisheka. my whole family were busy with devotees… no one had time to listen me… my home was full of our disciples. in this mean time, i wanted any my servant with me. coz, any1 could touch me after shower. at last my one servant came to me. then he took 2 more servants… now i was fully ready to go at temple without any problem…… they made a one circle for my security and not allowing anyone to touch me. by their efforts i reached the temple safely. washed my feet, hands and mouth again as per the temple rule. took carnamrita before to go at the alter. now, i was walking in the corridor, instantly i felt my heart beats are high. ooohhhhhhhhhhhhh… my Lord is in front of me… huge devotees’ crowd standing on the courtyard…. all of them in the mood to spread his name in this world. but my radharamanji’s was sitting on the abhisheka throne. looking so nice in only white dhoti, and his naughty smile (which kills everyone) was sitting on his cheeks, my father had started abhisheka.
so as per our custom, i again washed my hands after enter in the alter. then took perfume on my hand…. went outside to gave him sastang pranam and touched his feet. it was such a beautiful feeling… actually, i love to touch him countinuesly. i feel some raises go in my body.
after finished my parnam. i was ready for my work. dady has called me up and gave all his responsibilities to me. now i was the one who had started to do abhisheka of My Radha Ramanji in presence of thousands devotees and 20 to 30 goswamis on the alter.
when i was pouring milk on Him. i was little afraid and sad coz of my lower back pain. i was feeling that i could not do His abhisheka. Last few months i am suffering in it even, i was unabled to do gaur purnima abhisheka in our Mahaprabhu temple.
but today you know wht happened? i took my father’s responsibilities near about 8.30 am. and after that i did abhisheka for 4 hours countinuously and poured more than 800 kilo liters… wasn’t it shocking?
I didnt know either i have to be shocked or surprised. no back pain still. it is all His BLESSINGS AND WONDERFUL MERCY. he is my everything. he made me so much happy today. because of Him, i again got the chance to be with Him and serve my all desire unto His Lotus feet. Happy Birthday my Radha Ramanji. you always fulfill my innermost dreams. i am so lucky to have a
First Day with Shri Radharaman (1998)
In 1998, I was a teen-ager I had some kalyugi dreams in my eyes. But as per my father’s order I had chosen my goals. He told me join him on the altar. My first day on the altar. I was so much nervous after thinking about this. Because I was going to be the very youngest Goswami on the alter. My dad was giving me instructions in every single moment. So firstly I took bath. Wore new thread then pink dhoti and duppata. I was feeling like a VIP and keeping some proud. Because after this day I would be the full Goswami.
Anyways, so I newly dressed. Went to the temple with my servants. My Guru Maharaj was waiting for me on the altar. He said Chandan, wash your legs because you came with bare feet. Then wash your hands because you touched doors and walls. And at last rinse your mouth because mouth have to be cleaned. I followed him. I sat down in front of him. He started to teach me firstly, he put gopi chandan tilak on my body. Then he covered my head by gamsha and instructed me to touch his left toe by my right hand and right toe by my left hand. I just followed the customs to get my initiation. Actually, in our Goswamis we get initiation two initiations. Firstly on the Upnayan time and secondly on the first day with Radharamanji. So, I took my second guru mantra. After that I donated some stuff to him. He told me to do sastang pranam to Sri Radharamanji. And then put your right leg first in the deity room. I did sastang pranam. Now when I was entering in the deity room. God! Electricity gone. In the presence of four Goswami and my dad. I stepped my first step in the deity room. They fired the candles. Ohhhhhh my God! My god is front of me. Aawwwwwwww!! My heartthrobs are going faster like a jet plane. I was feeling strange. Because I never ever thought the deity room like this. It was very dirty actually. I became sad because my Radharamanji is living in the dirty room. Hey prabhu, after entered in the room. All Goswami had started to instruct me like hell. In the meantime, I was so down. But I was enjoying fully different look of Radharamanji from the altar. I never ever imagine seeing him like that. He was totally different. So, I washed my hands again in the room. Because if we are inside, then we are not allowed to touch any outside thing. If we come outside from the deity room and touch even the deity room gate or curtains or any outside things thousand times then as per our rules we have to wash our hands thousand times.
I got the new order to do the morning Srngar aarti. Believe me my whole body was shaking. I didn’t know how to do the aarti in front of hundreds of devotees. I remember, on that day, I was so depressed because, I was caring devotees instead of Sri Radha Ramanji. I was feeling if I do bad aarti then everyone would laugh on me.
At last, time was there to do aarti. My body was shaking. I was feeling awkward to be on the altar. 5 Goswami were instructing me how to do aarti. In the meantime, I forgot my Lord. I started to concentrate on the aarti. Curtain was opened. Bells were ringing. I started to do aarti while I was depressed. Bell was on my left hand and aarti was on my right hand. But when I was concentrating on my aarti then bell was going off. Or when I was concentrating on the bell then my aarti was not moving. I was confused, fully depressed legs were shaking like anything. Heartbeats were high, bell and aarti were not going together even these 5 Goswami were not leaving me alone. And these instructions. Ahhhhhhhhh… My god! Why they all want to make me perfect in the first day.
I did the aarti. Again all Goswamis had started to show me the deity room and all the stuff. While I was thinking, Why can’t they think I am the youngest one and can’t learn everything on the very first day?
Ohhh!! at last time came up. Radharamanji went to take lunch with his Beloved Shri Radha. I got the time to recover myself. And started to meditate and think about His lotus feet and new-look darshan of Radha Ramanji as today my life is changing. I started to chant my guru mantra. You know what? Automatically the mood, the love, the inspiration came inside me. I felt very energetic. Now I was ready by myself to do His last morning Raj Bhoga aarti. Now Radharamanji was sitting with Sri Radha. I started aarti. Chanting Guru Mantra. Looking at his face. One very mystical smile was sitting on the Divine Deity. My full concentration was on Him. I didn’t know howcome. But now bell and aarti were going together. Everyone enjoyed my aarti and they were little shocked that howcome a new Goswami did such a beautiful aarti.
I realized I was not shaking. How did I do aarti? In all the confusion I saw Radha Ramanji, and came to know the meaning of His suspicious smile. Ohhh Lord that was your first blessing on me. I am fully aware of the power of Guru Mantra and the power of YOU. Thank you so much to allow me to serve you so early. This is all your blessings that protects me everytime. I love you a lot. You are my lifetime achievement. Jai Radha Raman!
